Update on Dad (Dood)
Well I am breathing a bit more easily today. I didn't realize just how much I was holding my breath and clenching my teeth until I unlocked my jaw last night and felt some relief. I even managed to attend aquafit classes for an hour last night.
I went to see Dad yesterday and take his floodlight quality lamp for his room. He must have been feeling a bit more settled because he was instructing me on how to assemble the lamp telling me not to cross-thread it or I will wreck it. I walked in and totally busted him flirting with a young nurse!! I'm sure pretty soon he'll be kissing their hands. They are so kind and helpful and they are taking really good care of him. They help him to eat and give him whatever he wants (not like home where we were monitoring his sweets). He likes the apple juice and of course I had to remind him that if they are monitoring him, then they'll tell him if he's had too much. Chandal (his nurse was reading to him and he loved that. Karen a student nurse will spend the next 4 weeks with him and I can almost guarantee that she'll be visiting him long after her rotations are done. A couple of friends from his casino bus trip visited him at the Riverview and a few more have said that they'll go to his new home to visit (as have some family friends).
He said something funny while I was there. This is how the conversation went:
Dad: Okay Sandra, I want to be frank with you.
Sandra: Yes Dad. What is it? (me thinking that he is going to complain about something)
Dad: I just want to say that you are worrying too much about me. You don't have to do that.
Sandra: Dad, it's my job to worry about you when you can't do it for yourself.
Dad: yes, I know but you worry too much. I'm okay. I'm okay.
Sandra: Dad, do you remember the time when I was a baby and I was scalded badly with milk and the doctor told you that I was going to die because no one survives a burn that bad? You said I spent 16 days in the hospital. Right? And did you worry about me and come to see me or did you stay away?
Dad: I came to the hospital 3 or 4 times a day.
Sandra: Okay dad, now it's my turn to worry about you. That's just how it's going to be.
Dad: okay but don't do so much of it. I have to say though, that if you didn't worry these last five years, I'd be dead already.
Sandra: Okay, let's go for a walk to the sunroom.
Dad: Will you come with me?
Sandra: Of course!
So I think he is getting comfortable with his surroundings and hopefully will do better than expected. His left side face is quite swollen (the tumour was mostly contained on the right side of his face for the last 5 years but has now spread to the left side) but it not causing major pain yet so he is on his regular pain meds of hydromorph (much stronger than morphine and would probably flatten most people). I think he uses my reaction to his health as the yardstick of how good/bad he is doing so I am always careful not to look too anxious or worried when I am talking to him although I try not to hide things about his health from him (at least not major things) but I do choose my words carefully.
I have a stack of emails that I printed from some of you and will take them over to read to him. He'll like that. Take care all and love to all of you.